World of Warcraft Buffs in the Real World
Remote Attention. Allows you to remotely sense what a toddler (up to level 24) is doing. Range: 1 yard per level.
Mystic Comprehension. Understand toddler speach (level 15 or greater) for two minutes. Does not allow you to speak in Toddler.
Ghostly Hands. Manipulate a child without actually touching it. Can be used to change up to level 8 diapers.
Chaotic Banishment. Cleans an area equal to your level in square yards, putting away toys, sweeping floors and vacuuming rugs. Does not clean liquids, does not repair broken toys or furniture.
Arj’quns Attitude Adjustment. Chance to calm an upset child, 1% per level. Cannot be used to stop crying.
Guardian of the Ancients. Summons a grandparent, permitting you to do something else for 30 minutes. Two day cooldown.