Schrodinger's Zzzzz's

The Quantum Sleeper is a “bed safe” — a gizmo that folds up into a safe room whilst you do the sleep-of-the-just thing.

I suppose that you anchor the thing down really well (or your would-be foiled kidnappers could just demount it and stick it in the back of their truck). Beasts in nature have developed many strategies for dealing with turtles…

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