I just got done being a juror on a very short two-day trial (about as short as they come). This was a criminal case that wasn’t even close. We reached our decision in about 30 seconds, spent ten or fifteen minutes tossing the evidence around and being absolutely sure, and then we sent a guy to jail for a while.
Words of advice:
- If you have been arrested and are being video taped by the police, shut the fuck up until you have legal representation. Realio trulio honest to God just shut your damned pie-hole and be quiet. What the guy said on camera wasn’t a key piece of evidence, but it sure didn’t help.
- Meatloaf may turn up in unexpected places. If you’re ever up to something sketchy and a small voice in your brain is trying to say, “Hey, rest of my brain, you might want to reconsider this thing you’re about to do because it’s against the law and also kind of fucked up, too,” you should listen. Because: Meatloaf.
I’ll leave you with that little mystery and I’m never going to explain it.
I got a second call from “Microsoft Support” this evening and it was another lost opportunity because my dinner was ready and frankly I wasn’t in the mood to troll the scammer after battling the Forces of Criminal Idiocy earlier. “Sir, your license to run Windows has been revoked because of viruses and we must check your registry.” / “Oh no! This sounds serious. We’d better do something about it!” Then the microwave beeped and I lost heart. I told the scammer to get an honest job and stop being a crook and hung up.
Any other day and it would have been epic, though.