First, read this
Now, then . . .
PHP: Because there was nobody around to stop us.
PowerBuilder: Because you are a moron. (Also: We are, too).
Haskell: Because you are a moron. (Also: We are super geniuses and have proved it).
FORTH: Can We Because
Microcode: Because assembly language is too high level
Ada: Because we were just following orders
Brainfuck, Intercal, Whitespace, et al: Because!