O Limp Icks

I swear to God, if I see another story on NBC about “How I made it to the Olympics despite (a) my crippling neural disease, (b) stifling poverty and a crippling neural disease, (c) my whole poverty-stricken neighborhood and my entire family and street beset with assorted crippling neural diseases, or (d) that my parents were NBC reporters and totally lacking in functional neurons” I’m going to write to the Olympic Committee and suggest that we hold a Zombie Olympics, or maybe one with just reporters hanging out and trading notes on neural diseases they’ve overcome.

I can just see that:

“Bob, here comes Kathy Gizzard around the last turn in the Women’s  300 meter grovel.  And she is, she is –”

“Yes! She’s overcoming adversity!”

“And poverty, Bob, don’t forget poverty.”

“With her rare neural disease in fine form, too.  She’s nearly there . . . YES! A new world’s record for abjectly miserable sports coverage.”

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11 Responses to O Limp Icks

  1. Try living five miles from the Olympic village…… I am *SO* glad I left London for the countryside as it means that when 2012 rolls around I can avoid the absolute and total mayhem that Stratford will be. Shame I still have to pay for the exorbitant bunch of nonsense.

    Damn Government. I swear they only gave us the 2012 games because they hate us.

  2. Omer says:

    Lol.

    Yet another reason to completely ignore this joke.

  3. stick to code says:

    i enjoy your blurbs on coding/atari much more than this tripe.

  4. landon says:

    @stick to code:

    Fine. Go read another blog.

  5. john says:

    I happen to enjoy whatever you have to say and I totally agree with you as well. It is almost as if China is hosting the Special Olympics. What I would like to see is more television coverage. I am sick seeing the Olympics covered only by NBC in the states.

  6. Josh P. says:

    I agree with you Landon. I dont give a rats ass about the sob story behind every little athlete. “Congratulations. You’re a beautiful and unique snowflake. Now go play your damned sport and shut up about how many obstacles you had to overcome to get there.” Is what i would like to say to half of them. My fiancee is 21 years old and we’re battling a nasty case of breast cancer at the moment. You don’t see me on NBC getting interviewed about how difficult it is to write decent code when you don’t sleep for days on end because you’re waiting up in a hospital lounge, do you? NO. Because my personal life is irrelevant and completely unrelated to my other activites.

    I mean, don’t get me wrong. I know that competing in your favourite sport on an international level, accumulating fame and potential sponsorship fortune, can be a very daunting task, but I don’t wanna hear about you’re brain disease. I watch cycling for the sport, not for the battle against cancer. I watch diving for the acrobatics, not for the day-to-day struggle with diabetes. If you want a pat on the head and a gold star, get your ass on Oprah and cry about it. If you want to compete in the Olympics, talk about your training regimen and how many squats you can do. My Olympic news coverage should be just that; Olympic NEWS coverage. If I want your life story, i’ll buy your autobiography.

    But hey….maybe i’m just a cynic. Perhaps these people really do deserve a fresh batch of cookies and a nice glass of warm milk. Unlike the rest of society, they struggle with stuff in thier lives! They deserve it!

  7. zh says:

    Wow, strong words. But got the point. Agreed.

  8. XMSFT says:

    And I was just telling myself the other day that compared to the last olympics NBC seemed to have toned it down witht he ‘human interest stories”. Maybe I haven’t been watching as much 🙂

  9. Felix says:

    @Josh P: hope everything goes well brother

  10. Oisín says:

    Spot on. I can’t watch that stuff because the sickening pity-fest stuff is so farcical that it’s impossible to take seriously.

  11. William Mayo says:

    I feel somewhere along the line, our tendency to root for the underdog got picked up and turned into marketing. Now, the media tries to shoehorn even laudable successes into also being underdog stories, so they’ll sell better.

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